Air Travel

     Traveling is the best thing someone could do. Getting outside of the bubble that you live in and seeing other places and cultures is something that I wish I could do forever. The only thing that I find unsettling is the 'getting there' part.

     Air travel sucks. Just yesterday, I got back from my 40 day Kenyan adventure, which means I flew over 24 hours to get back to Houston (London stopover). Within the darkest day of my life I sat in a seat that probably contained an innumerable amount of bio hazards, including human farts, and a nine year old complaining about something no one cares about a row in front of me.

     The most concerning of the two flights was from London to Houston. The flight was completely full and in the row next to me I had a set of what looked like reverse Mormons. Two men, probably on their 50's flirting with a woman in the middle seat. They were acting like the teenager that I'm not, taking pictures together, sharing food with each other, and secretly wishing to be part of the Mile High Club. It was quite the party they were having.

     For this flight, British Airways was the lucky airline company that got to fly yours truly. Their service is fine and the inside of the plane is just like all the others. The only thing that was off was the complementary barf bag that is provided for after you eat the toxic airplane food.

     As you can see, once you up-chuck, you should give this bag to one of the crew members. Um. Gross. Being a crew member must really suck. Not only do you have to deal with people throwing up, but people in general. Handing your stomach contents back is the equivalent to putting a bag of dog poo on someone's door.

Those smiles a fake and all of these people actually hate you

     And then you have the bathrooms... I make sure that I go before I get on a flight. The bathroom, or should I say 'lavatory,' could be easily mistaken as a coffin. Unfortunately, this flight was long and I had to go. When I walked into the lavatory I knew what it felt like to be a Jew during the Holocaust. The smell of human flatulence burned into my nostrils, my eyes started to water, and in that moment my life flashed before my eyes. I had to walk out. I held it in. I would rather have some sort of renal failure than have to walk into that again. 


     With all this being said, I encourage each and every person to travel. It's quite fun...